FYI

Here is Roland Jenseric's shopping list:

• apples
• onions
• lard
• cheese
• milk

And here is Roland Jenseric:

aw man

If only I'd seen this ad when I was a kid...I coulda grown up and turned into Gamestop!

confession!

I have never played Final Fantasy VII. I KNOW. I hope you don't think any less of me.

OG survival horror

I love that thanks to Xbox Live, I have the option to play game demos at the price of no price. I will try any game for free. Any game I say! Recently I tried out the demo of the recent remake of Haunted House because why not? The original game, made for Atari 2600 and released in 1982, is likely the first survival horror game. I don't think I ever finished it- my disembodied eyeballs trapped in the Graves mansion, dying a slow death and eventually eaten by bats. In a strange way, I hope this is my real life fate as well.


The remake maintains the same premise as the original- search the mansion for pieces of an urn and defend yourself from ghosts, bats, and spiders with nary more than the light of a match. The graphics are decidedly improved, which...you know. You might expect that they would be considering the hardware advances that have happened over the 30 years between versions. 30 years. 30...years. THIRTY YEARS.


I can't lie, the demo was fun, if totally aimed at kids. Characters say things like "OMG!" which...blehhhhh. I'm not the target demographic, certainly, but the demo was enjoyable enough, maintaining the spirit of the original game.

Okay, secret revealed: while I did download and play the demo on a whim of curiosity, I'm really just using that fact to write something where I can post box and ad art from the original game, both of which are so good:



Beauteous! I love the way video game box art used to really fuel the imagination and despite the terrible graphics of the games (graphics, I should note, that were astounding at the time), the entire game world was fleshed out in my nerdy head. Maybe it's just kids that have that ability, I don't know. The box art was technically misleading, I guess, but to me it was always more a flavor-enhancer. Like Mrs Dash, or MSG!

Oh! And perhaps best of all is that all of this Haunted House talk led me to a startling discovery: you can play the original game on the new game's website. Perhaps my disembodied eyeballs will make it out of the mansion after all...

i am totally scientific

After asking you guys to answer some questions yesterday, I figured it was only fair that I answer them myself, too. Before I do that, however (I know, so exciting!), please- keep answering in the comments on that post! It's all quite enjoyable to read. Y'all loves some FFVII, huh?

Let's do this.

What's your favorite game genre (RPG, FPS, etc)?

Hmm. HMM. This is a tougher question than I thought. Survival horror? 3rd person adventure? RPG? RPG. Yes.

What's your favorite game of all time ever ever EVAR? Just one game. ONE I SAY.

Oh man, this is even tougher! Mass Effect. There, I said it. No wait, Dragon Age. No wait, Mass Effect and Dragon Age. Dang, that's two...okay, MassEffectDragonAge. That works!


If a game features moral choices...do you generally play it good or evil?

I always play through as "good" the first go-round, then "evil" with a different character the second time. My impulse is nearly always to be helpful and nice, even though...you know, it's not as if I'd be mean to real people or anything. But in a game, when it comes to, say, helping orphans or not, though, chances are I'm going to help them. It's usually a smart idea, too, as the "good" path tends to open up more missions and quests.

That's not to say there aren't times when I love being bad even on a goody-goody journey. I've punched plenty of people and stolen from them and more. Being bad in these games is frequently hilarious, which is why I need an "evil" playthrough, even if my behavior is sometimes cringe-worthy and totally over the top (I mean, have you ever executed Shiala on a Renegade run in Mass Effect? That's some cold-blooded shit!).

Do you play more than one major game at a time? Or play a game 'til its conclusion then move on to the next title?

I generally play through from beginning to end, lest I put a game down for too long and realize I have no clue what I'm doing when I pick it up again. Sometimes I'll break up a game by playing something that has no story to speak of (Rock Band, etc).
What's the first video game you remember playing?

Combat on Atari 2600, baby.


Which systems do you currently own/play?

Xbox 360 gets nearly all my love, but I still bust out the PS2 and GameCube, and I have a Super Nintendo sitting in my closet. I'd love a PS3...someday. And a Wii, too.

Do you participate in online gaming?

I'd have to say no, as I've only done it once. If I chose to engage in some online shenanigans, though, I'd only do it with people I know, even if I only know them in a cyber-fashion. The idea of jumping into a round of Halo with a bunch of unknown gamers gives me both the heebies and the jeebies.
Are you a release-day purchaser? Do you trade in games and buy used?

If possible financially, I'm definitely release-day for a few select series (Resident Evil, Silent Hill, anydamnthing from BioWare), but otherwise I wait for massive sales and price drops. As such, I'm generally way behind the curve on these things (who knows when I'll get to Dead Space 2?), but I don't mind.

I used to trade in games all the time as a means to save money on new titles, but I've stopped as I've really regretted getting rid of some games. For a few reasons, I've also stopped buying used unless the game is very old and out of print: you don't save much on recently-released games; I'd just...rather have new; publishers don't get any dough from used sales. I'd rather the people that make the game get some of my money rather than all of it going to the store selling it.

Oooh, I loves me some Resident Evil.

Are you more a console gamer or a PC gamer?

Console, although I have a couple of simple time-killers on my computer. My Mac is...well, it's a Mac, so there aren't a ton of games made for it, and besides- my Mac be old and it can run many games. I've nothing against PC gaming and if I could afford to make that happen for myself, I certainly would.

Do you play any "casual" games, such as the Zynga titles on Facebook (Farmville, Whateverville)?

None of the 'Villes, although the new Dragon Age game that'll be on Facebook is awfully tempting. I've played a few flash games in my day, though.

There. I think we all feel much closer now, yes?

totally scientific

Hey, game-players or people who do not play games: take part in my Curiosity Questionnaire by answering these questions in the comments. If you want. Could be fun. Maybe.

Curiosity Questionnaire!

1. What's your favorite game genre (RPG, FPS, etc)?
2. What's your favorite game of all time ever ever EVAR? Just one game. ONE I SAY.
3. If a game features moral choices...do you generally play it good or evil?



4. Do you play more than one major game at a time? Or play a game 'til its conclusion then move on to the next title?



5. What's the first video game you remember playing?
6. Which systems do you currently own/play?



7. Do you participate in online gaming?
8. Are you a release-day purchaser? Do you trade in games and buy used?
9. Are you more a console gamer or a PC gamer?
10. Do you play any "casual" games, such as the Zynga titles on Facebook (Farmville, Whateverville)?
    

Hooray, Curiosity Questionnaire!