mon histoire avec les video games, part one

As I mentioned yesterday in my remembrathon: yes, I'm old. There. Now let's move on so we can all thrill to this post which is all about my history with video games- the systems I've owned, the games I've hearted hard. Trust me, I realize that this really won't be interesting to anyone besides me, unless it spurs you on to great heights of nostalgia or maybe tosses out a game title that's new to you. That's all your business, however, and right now I just feel like having a nice cup of General Mills International Coffee (Suisse Mocha) with video games as we hash over times both old and new. See, I've been a gamer for pretty much my whole life and since, as I said, I'm old, I find it curious to marvel from time to time at how far the medium has come during my substantial lifespan. Come now, pour yourself a cup and get bored read on!

Atari 2600

I got my first taste of games thanks to my old pal Smitty when I was in...oh, fifth grade, maybe? His family was the first on the block to get the Atari 2600; it came with Combat, and all the neighborhood kids wanted a piece of the action. I mean, look at the box! Can you feel the flames shooting in your face? Are you choking on the smoke and covering your ears in a futile attempt to block out the roar of the engines? Don't lie. You know you are!

The game totally lived up to the promise of the box art. Check it out, and try to contain your eyeballs because they'll be popping out from the intensity.

I know it looks so lame, but you know what? It wasn't. We were all clamoring to play, always. Smitty's mom would only let one of his friends in at a time to play but we didn't care. Everyone else would hang around outside while one lucky soul went in for a round of Combat. "Jet Fighter" was my jam, and my love of video games was born. It wasn't too long until my family got the 2600 and that was it. If playing Combat at Smitty's put me on the road to loving video games, then my parents handed me a map and the keys to a car...or some other less muddled, more meaningful metaphor.

Favorite Atari 2600 games:

• Pitfall
• Yar's Revenge
• Missile Command
• Space Invaders
  
• Activision Grand Prix

Activision Grand Prix: you can practically smell the burning rubber

Nintendo Entertainment System

The leap from the 2600 to the NES was a mega one, wasn't it? First of all, it came with a gun and a robot. A GUN AND A ROBOT. Mind you, the robot proved quickly to be a pain in the ass and fairly useless and the gun fared not much better, but still. A gun and a robot. Even beyond that, it was a whole new world of gaming- more realistic, bigger, more exciting, games that spoke- spoke in voices! It was marvelous.

Incidentally, I hope that "A Whole New World" from Fievel or Aladdin or whatthefuckever is now stuck in your head.

So cool, so useless. Just like me!

Of course, Nintendo also gave a home to many who would become video game icons, characters who still appear in new games yearly- you know, like Mario and Link. Even crappy games were a revelation on this machine- I played more Top Gun and Airwolf than I care to admit (although...fuck yeah, Airwolf!). Was NES the greatest video game system of all time? No. But maybe.

Favorite NES games:

• Balloon Fight
• Dr. Mario
  
• Castlevania (even though I sucked at it- stupid Medusa heads)
• Contra (Do you know the Konami Code? If you do, type it now, substituting "ENTER" for "START")
• Excitebike (ah, such impossible tracks I would make!)
• The Legend of Zelda
• Prince of Persia
• R.C. Pro-Am (I loved this game more than it probably deserved)
• Super Mario Brothers (all of them. ALL OF THEM I SAY)
  
• Paperboy (that bitch in the convertible got me every time)

Super Nintendo

8-bit gave way to 16-bit and I got the first game system to hug and call my very own. This was one hell of a system with some damn terrific games. I had SNES and my best friend had Sega Genesis- between the two of us we played everything there was to play while his mother yelled at us to go get some sunshine. I never really got into RPGs during the SNES era; whatever Final Fantasys and Chrono Triggers were out there in the world, they passed me by. I was all about platformers, side scrollers, and anything else I could play co-op.

Favorite SNES games:

• Alien 3 (this was, like, my favorite game for a while. Bald, badass Ripley FTW!)
• Star Fox
  
• Aladdin (ridiculously fun)
• Donkey Kong Country
• Star Trek: The Next Generation (does it GET any geekier?)
• Shadowrun
• Pilotwings
• Super Mario Kart
• Super Star Wars (and SSW: Empire Strikes Back and SSW: Return of the Jedi...all three games were hard as hell!)
• Zombies Ate My Neighbors

Oh, giant baby from Zombies At My Neighbors...I love you

So there you go, Part One is out of the way. I bet you can't wait for Part Two, amiright? Well, you'll just have to. In the meantime, you can bore me with your history!